Liam (while putting a propeller back on a little plane): No Indy, you can't poke that! When you're a boy and strong then you can poke. But you're too girl right now. First you have to run run run and eat a good snack and then you can be strong like me. THEN you can poke!
Bill - Place pizza, any pizza, on plate. Eat
Tracy - Place either Hawaiian or cheese pizza on plate. Eat.
Asher - Take cheese pizza, scrape each and every speck of cheese and sauce off, then sprinkle liberally with Parmesan cheese. Eat.
Liam - Take cheese pizza, separate cheese from pizza crust, then eat components independently.
Miles - Gnaw on pizza crusts left over from the boys. Scream bloody murder if crusts are forcibly removed from grip.
Indy - Scrap the whole pizza idea. Serve one slice of roast beef lunch meat, 6 goldfish crackers, and a quarter cup of mayonnaise.
Not really into all the political party going on, so back to what I care about - remembering goofy things my kids say (this would be Tracy, obviously, and not Bill. He loves them politicking).
Asher(while putting on pajamas): Hey mom, I always take off my socks when I put on my pajamas, but I never take off my underwear. I ALWAYS sleep with my underwear on because it protects my bottom!
Mom: Hmm, um, good to know Asher.
Asher: So if anyone tries to attack my bottom at night it's protected! My underwear is amazing.
For posterity's sake, today at breakfast Miles began signing both 'more' and 'all done' and did a recognizable mimic of both. He's 9 months and 9 days old.
Asher and I routinely get into a debate over how many great blue whales could fit inside the pointy building (Asher's name for the tallest skyscraper downtown). I don't know how he draws me into this discussion over and over, but he is convinced that whales are so big that only 2 or three would fit in the building. I argue that it's closer to 2 or 3 per floor or so, so at least 50 whales should fit. We have this discussion at least once a week. Yesterday he got annoyed with my inability to grasp just how big whales are so changed the subject slightly.
"Mom, how long in minutes do you think it would take to get to the top of the pointy building?"
"I don't know Asher. If I had to walk all the way to the top it would take me a long time, over 100 minutes at least."
"Hmmm, well what if you used the elevator?"
"Ahh, that's more like it. That would probably take me less than 5 minutes."
"Well, what if you used a simple machine? Like an inclined plane?"
I had no answer for that. Other than to call his dad and grandma and revoke his science center privileges effective immediately.
Sam: Asher, you need to put your pants on.
Asher: No, my rule is I don't have to wear pants in the afternoon.
I should have a whole category of posts about silly things I have to tell our kids not to do. When my parents were with us in California they said they'd like a recording of all of my interventions from the day. This followed me telling Asher, "Asher, do not spit in the tea pot!"
Today's interventions:
Liam, Do not use Asher's Pooh to clean your bottom."
